If you are ready to live the life you want, learning how to tap into your personal power is essential. We all have our own personal power, but most of the time, we unconsciously give it away or overexert it where it doesn’t belong. Let me begin by explaining what personal power is and what it isn’t.
What is Personal Power?
My definition of personal power is that it holds your infinite potential, energy, strength, confidence, and authentic highest potential. It’s knowing that you must take full responsibility for your life and own your decisions. Your personal power holds the ability to make conscious choices that are in alignment with your values, beliefs, and desires.
What it isn’t…
When we discuss personal power in this blog, we never refer to or consider the idea of overpowering, manipulating, or coercing someone else into doing what we want. We have no right to impose ourselves on others in this way; that would be a misuse of our personal power.
What do we do with our Personal Power?
If you’re anything like me, then you are going to want to tap into your personal power for the best potential outcome. Our personal power allows you to make conscious choices that align with healthy boundaries, your truth, and your intentions for an extraordinary life. Our personal power is the foundation for creating a life of peace, purpose, and fulfillment
Understand that we control how we think, feel, and act, and we have the power to shape our own destiny.
First and foremost, we need to identify how we are giving away our personal power.
I’ll share a few of my own examples.
Years ago, I remember being met with upset drivers for a while. I’d be driving, minding my own business when, for no apparent reason, other drivers would become angry and flip me off. My reaction was always to give back to them what they gave me. So, if they showed me their middle finger, I would give it right back. I’d be upset because I felt that it was uncalled for. I’d become angry, and now my mood and my day were negatively impacted. I let these people get to me, essentially, I gave my power away because I let myself get angry.
One day, my husband was in the car with me, and he said, “Why don’t you just give them the peace sign?” When he said that, I was shaken to my core because I had never thought of it before. In that split second, I realized that it was a brilliant idea and that all this time, I had let other people influence my ability to express myself in a way that contradicted how I truly wanted to. I had been misusing my personal power.
I’m a no-drama kind of person. Letting someone get to me didn’t resonate with who I felt I was. It was a much-needed ah-ha moment because I learned that I had the personal power to decide how I wanted to feel and how I wanted my day to go, and that it’s none of my business what that person was feeling. Instead of flipping someone off, I can just throw the peace sign. They don’t get to have any of my energy.
It’s like the saying goes, Not My Monkey, Not My Circus.
Remember, our personal power is best used when we are living in alignment with our highest values. Letting people or situations get the best of us is only giving away our personal power.
Imagine, being in a relationship with (or a working relationship) with someone who demands and demeans you and you just accept it. You don’t like how it feels, but because you don’t know how to approach it so you just take it. Or perhaps you have tried to approach this situation, but it backfires. Out of fear that it might get worse, you say nothing and put up with it. In many situations like this, it can feel as though you’re the victim. This is an example of letting someone take your power away.
But, if we look at this through the filter of your personal power, you are never a victim. In this scenario, you take responsibility for being in this dysfunction. And you would access your personal power to figure out how to exit this situation. This may look different for everyone, but it might mean you need to set boundaries, find a new job, or end a relationship. You are in control of your life.
How do we create the change?
- Recognize Your Power: Start by acknowledging that you can make choices that influence your life.
- Take Responsibility: Take responsibility for the choices you have made that may have landed you in hot water. Let go of the victim mindset and own your decisions, even if they were influenced by the past experiences.
- Set Boundaries: Protect your energy by setting healthy boundaries and decide what kind of relationships you want in your life and what you no longer accept.
- Journal: Reflection and awareness will help you.
Here’s how I journal:
I begin with an update about my life or when I need to vent. I express my emotions, thoughts, beliefs, fears, and hopes on paper. I always try to find the silver lining in every situation- good or bad. And every few days or weeks go back and read your journal.
Can you see any patterns? What do you notice?
Your personal power allows you to make intentional, conscious choices toward cultivating the life you want. The path to peace is owning the fact that it’s up to you what will drain you, hurt you, inspire you, and motivate you. You hold the power and choose peace over chaos. You can choose peace over stress. You always have a choice.